I understand bariatric troubles. My first surgery was in 2010. I was about 420 before the lap band. My doctor didn’t want to do it, but I was afraid of what I then called ‘mutilating my stomach.’ I had a sister who had the bypass and she was completely a mess. I know most of it was her own making, but there were mistakes by the surgeon as well.
I was scared to have the bypass. The sleeve wasn’t used then so the other options just seemed worse. I persuaded the surgeon to do the lap band. It happened in March of 2010. On surgery day, I was 397. I got down to about 268 in about a year and a half. I enjoyed a trip to Disney, but I was pretty miserable. I throw up a lot. We kept going in to readjust the filling and then sometimes taking out the filling on the lap band. I’m not going into specifics here, but basically you have a port, they put liquid in and it keeps your stomach ‘fuller’ so you eat less.
Eventually, I had to have the lap band removed. The new doctor I was using wanted me to get the duodenal switch. I said hell no and walked out of his office, vowing to lose weight on my own. I worked with a nutritionist and my therapist to figure out why I was addicted to food. You see I was really food addicted and I believe that many people who have these surgeries are. No one during this process prepared me for the feelings of loss and loneliness I’d feel without being able to overeat. No one told me that I would feel mental stuff because of this physical change.
I worked on myself for three years. I did try a lot of things to lose weight. I kept gaining. In December of 2016, I was at 387 lbs. I also tore my meniscus in my knee. I needed knee surgery but couldn’t have it because of my size. I decided to go back to a new doctor and get the sleeve. I went through the process. I prepared myself mentally and physically. I had the sleeve on June 6, 2017. I have, to date, lost 115 lbs from my high weight of 387. I still have a long way to go. 272 is good, but my goal is 175. I will get there.
Food is not an issue for me. I do still struggle with regurgitation and vomiting. I’m currently working with my surgeon to figure out what’s wrong. I have bad days and good days. I understand the process is not easy, but I am not a food addict anymore. Food is just food. A cookie, my food love, is now just a cookie and I don’t care if I eat it or not.
It’s very freeing and allows me to do other things and focus on other things like being a life coach and helping others like me. I’ve been there. I get it. Thank you for hearing some of my story.
Deanna Goodson 